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Opinions wanted…

September 25, 2006

Or, maybe not.

Over the past few months I’ve been asked for advice by some of the soon-to-be or new moms that I know.  (I am not going to name any names to protect the innocent…)  Well, I just have a few things to say.


There, I said it.  I feel better, do you?

I don’t always consider myself to be very bold or anything, but when I get to talking about pregnancy, childbirth, doctors, breastfeeding, baby-wearing, etc.  My opinions take over.  I am pretty sure it’s not always easy for the "advice-seekers" to hear what I have to say, but I have the need to say it. 

At the risk of offending those who will take this post personally, I say, "I am sorry, but I have to say it."

  • The baby will be born when it is ready, induction by pitocin is NOT always a good thing and a planned induction date is not reason for celebration.
  • Birth isn’t a sickness and a hospital is NOT always the best place to bring your baby into the world.
  • There is nothing "comforting" about being stuck in a bed strapped to monitors.
  • Women who choose to birth at home without a doctor are not weird.  Trusting your body to do what it is created to do does not make one a weirdo.
  • Not all women who birth at home, or nurse their babies longer than a few months, or co-sleep, or wear their babies are granola-crunching hippies.  We’re in the mainstream too!
  • A pediatrician does not always know what is best for your baby.  Trust your instincts, don’t just agree to what some guy/gal with a degree says!
  • Breastfeeding IS natural, but it doesn’t always come naturally.  Like anything else in life, the more you work to improve at it, the better it will get!
  • Pumping is not = to breastfeeding.
  • VERY few women are unable to nurse a baby with success.
  • Holding a newborn DOES NOT spoil that child!
  • A newborn that like to be held is NOT a grumpy/fussy/clingy-baby, IT’S JUST A BABY!
  • Helping a new mom should not mean you are there to hold or feed her newborn, you should be there to help her cook/clean/do laundry, etc.  A new mom has waited over nine months to hold that baby that has been growing inside her, are you going to take that away from her and make her do a load of laundry or cook you a meal?
  • A Daddy does not need to give the baby a bottle in order to be "involved" with raising the baby.  There is more to attachment than feeding time.

Well, as you can imagine I could go on for a while more, but I am sure some of you are already rolling your eyes at me.  I just thought you deserved a warning, if you would like my advice or want to hear what works for us, that’s what you’re going to get.  My opinions.  No it isn’t fact, no I am not a doctor, no I am not the world’s greatest mom.

I’m just a mom with three kids and one on the way and I know what feels right.

4 Comments leave one →
  1. brittany permalink
    September 25, 2006 2:39 PM

    sounds good to me…luv ya!

  2. September 25, 2006 3:25 PM

    I think pregnancy – birth – childrearing are hard topics. We all have opinions – we know what has worked for us, and we want to share that knowledge with others.

    I personally was very humbled with the birth of my first child – everything was progressing normally and I had all my plans for a nice, natural childbirth. Well, he turned AFTER his due date, and there was no way I was going to be able to get that 9 pounder out sideways… so I ended up having a C-section. Was rather disappointed, but was able to learn some things from it.

    My major pet peeve, though, is with the whole breastfeeding thing. I really want to throttle people who say “It just didn’t work for me” after trying it once or twice. Yes, it takes some work but it’s SOOOOOOO much healthier for both the baby and the mother! God designed it this way – do they really think that companies can produce something better?!?

    OK, stepping off of the soapbox… 🙂

  3. Karen permalink
    September 25, 2006 9:20 PM

    Yup, seems to be lotsa profit to be made in the baby industry. if not on one end, then on the other 😉 guess my point of view–not that anyone asked– is that each mother do what makes her most comfortable as long as it doesn’t harm anyone. walking a mile in the other gal’s shoes, so to speak. just my 2 cents….

  4. Auntie Kisses aka Sister Laurie permalink
    October 5, 2006 8:40 PM

    WoW! I missed all this … I haven’t had time to catch up … ya know with being pregnant myself 😉 or going to Aruba & working … whatever! LOL Anyway, Lei, I REALLY appriiciate your opinions, as you can probably tell, becasue I haven’t stopped asking now have I:)

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